My story
I, just like you, searched for my personal power and was looking for my purpose everywhere. I tried a gazillion different things to arrive here – feeling truly authentic and confident in what I do and who I am.
About the event
For a very long time I associated my worth with what I could do…
My need for external validation was at it’s peak whilst I was a dance teacher as my passion side job. Being able to give to others and receive praise back gave me a lot of sense of purpose. Yet I knew and felt it wasn’t it.
I’ve tried more than 14 professions from working at a grocery story at 14 to leaving comfortable office copywriter position at 27. All the jobs I tried gave me a lot of diverse knowledge that I put to work now. Yet none of them where the thing I searched for.
That search was the strongest in..
My personal relationships. Especially the romantic ones. I really wished to meet someone who would take care of my life (so I wouldn’t have to). I hoped to be swept away by a person who just would let me be me, whilst handling all the important life things for us.
As I wished for the outside to fix me, my life’s journey took me to healing myself. Realising that no one from the outside could give me that full sense of worth.
I had to learn how to be enough on my own. And so I did.
Which in return gave me the love of my life and enough time and space to realise what I actually want to give to this world.
You see, in my 20’s I was in survival mode..
I hoped for the saviour,
because I was in self-victim mode. I was not yet ready to grow up. I had so many childhood wounds. And it was easier to want to be saved rather to deal with the pain, shame and guilt the healing required to embrace.
I trusted the outside opinions more,
because I didn’t trust myself. In fact, I didn’t know myself that well. I even felt that I needed to learn who I am better. I just didn’t know how..
I was so afraid,
as I was just taking my 1st wobbly steps towards real freedom. I had come out of an abusive relationship. I was studying. I was working. I was teaching dancing. I was busy and trying to keep all together.
Unknowingly, I did
what I needed the most. I needed safety. I needed to heal. And I created that for myself. That is why at my 27 I had built enough safety for myself to challenge myself again. I left my corporate job. That decision opened up the possibility of the life I have now.
About the event
In that same year I also met my partner.
I had healed enough to not seek a saviour anymore, so when we met, we both were authentic enough to recognise each other as what we truly like.
That led to me moving abroad to the Netherlands and only there in 2021 I fully realised that I wanted to build my own business.
I took up some coaching to ‘kick me on the butt’ to make it happen (Obviously, it worked).
At that stage of my life I finally started to become clear on what I wanted to give to others. I had finally healed enough to believe that I had some worth to give.
The process of being an entrepreneur has challenged every part of the sense of worthiness in me. The doubts still can come up in some moments.
Yet, I finally have the right tools, self awareness and trust in myself that I am worthy. I know what to do when self-doubts arise and I know they are just old patterns.
And so we arrive to today,
when I know crystal clear what is my chosen purpose. I know that my worth is inherent, no matter of what I do or don’t do, I’m still worthy. I know that I am enough and that you are, too.
I have proven to myself that I am that saviour of myself. I am that super hero who made her way through the challenges. I know that I am capable to give. And I choose to give from being so fully myself, that it flows over.. I wish my story towards authenticity reminds you that you are authentic as well!
Find out how you can access your authenticity