Linda Horsta

Tag: twin flame

  • “All men are pigs”..

    “All men are pigs”..

    Or “there are no good men left” are truly limiting thoughts that love to circle around. Yet is it the truth? The whole vast truth about all men on this planet..

    The issue is that when you believe in statements like that you limit yourself and you don’t notice the ones who are not. Your mind dismisses them, finds excuses why you don’t like the ones who are worthy of you.

    Yes, you focus your mind on the negative ones who stand out, but don’t notice the quiet ones nearby. We see this trend in politics at the moment as well.

    We’ve always had it in pop culture. Negative emotions are powerful at taking our attention and link very quickly to our reactive primitive mind centers.

    We protect ourselves.

    But is this the whole truth about the men available?

    Does this reflect every single man on this planet?

    Of course, not.

    You simply don’t know enough good examples and there might not be a habit of doubting black and white statements. Reality is always in the full color spectrum. Yes, the negative does exist, but so does positive and all in between, which is often the majority.

    For your mind to expand and notice the others you need to start to question these thoughts. Question them in conversations with your friends and others. You don’t need to oppose others opinions, but you can question your own.

    Often what we say is emotional, only partially reflective of the reality. Often blowing up a detail feels satisfying, yet it does not mean it’s factually true.

    How about you find one man that you think is kind of okay. Is there one? Keep on searching and you’ll realise that there are more. Perhaps start with your closest people.

    There are plenty of men who are willing to work on themselves and care deeply to be in a loving relationship. I know that, because I meet them in my coaching practice and conversations around the topics I work with.

    Yes, good men exist even in 2025 and there are good men available and searching for a romantic relationship at this very moment.

    Change your mindset = change your life and experience the love you seek!

    So start by asking those questions to yourself first and perhaps you’ll realise what’s needed to move. Or perhaps it will open up other areas to expand your mindset on as often we have thoughts like this to protect ourselves.

    As a coach I love to work on becoming aware of the protection mechanisms and finding ways to honor them, whilst opening the mindset to a chance of finding the love you seek. Contact me to receive a 30min. free intake session to try out how relationship coaching works.

  • The cost of lack of commitment in relationships

    The cost of lack of commitment in relationships

    Many have no idea that they are not ready to commit the attention, hours and their energy to building a new healthy relationship.

    If the relationships you choose tend to be not so great that is your unconscious comfort zone. Yet to change that you would need to invest yourself in development and opening your awareness of the subconscious acts. Now that takes commitment.

    Commitment to working through the uncomfortable parts of yourself both in becoming more self aware and in real life with another person.

    The truth is any new relationship will bring up the uncomfortable, the question is how you deal with that on your own and together.

    By becoming more aware through therapy or coaching can help you start to react differently. Notice the patterns and take a breath, before reacting in the old unconscious ways. That alone creates a new dynamic, where you can continue to develop yourself and change action patterns.

    How to feel more commited?

    Ask yourself how much has it cost you to no commit.. How many loving moments you haven’t been able to enjoy? How lonely have you felt? How often have you longed for someone special to just come into your life? How many times have you had to answer annoying questions about “why you don’t have anyone yet” and felt shitty afterwards?

    Which relationship never flourished, because you where never ready to work on it? How many potentially good connections you surpassed, because it didn’t feel like the one?

    How much love did you miss out on?

    Once you know the cost of not be willing to work on it, you may realise it’s too high not to try once more. The highest cost of not working on your romantic relationships is the constant returning to the same old patterns.

    By working on yourself you will learn how things can improve, by working in your relationships you’ll learn that everyone is doing it.

    No relationship is perfect. All are bringing up our depths and once we are willing to accept that relationships, especially romantic ones, are a place of self-growth and a place to learn, we can have them with ease.

    Whilst you think that romantic relationships are dreamily ideal, you are not open to the reality that there are two persons working on themselves and the relationship regularly, like in a life school. Relationship school.

    A healthy romantic relationship is something that is built by at least 2 people, who work on themselves and the relationship. They choose each other daily and are willing to accept the not-so-comfortable.

    Life brings up challenges and we are there to face them. In a healthy relationship you are aware of how it affects you personally and then communicate with your partner to understand how it impacts them. Then from there you may find ways on how to face it.

    So is the cost of returning to the old patterns and unhealthy relationships enough for you to start the first step and change your life and how you relate?

    If yes, then reach out to the specialist you feel connected to. I offer 30min. free intake session so that you know for sure if coaching and my communication style fits you.

  • Finding the 1

    Finding the 1

    My life was defined by this sentence for 15 years. My oh my.. how much I longed to be loved and cared for.

    And every time I met someone I liked and things went okay at the beginning I excitedly told my girls: “I think he is the one”. Funnily enough none of them where.

    Until..

    I met a man who was interesting, yet mysterious. His actions spoke louder than any of his words. He showed up daily in the dance festival where we met, finding me amongst the 2 thousand dancers to have many dances each night together. He talked to me daily since we went on our first date in September 2019. He built my trust in him with each action he took.

    And I finally didn’t think if he was the one. I was suspicious of where it will go for our beginning months, yet I was open that it could go either way. I finally was present in reality, instead of dreaming of what could be.

    I did enjoy our long distance romance and 4 months later we became a couple. A couple living more than 1000 km apart. We travelled to each other monthly for a while and then Covid hit. Latvia closed it’s borders instantly for an unknown amount of time.

    We spent 3months apart, yet we got closer. I asked every single question I thought as important for me to know about him and his thoughts.

    The week Latvia opened its borders, he bought his flight and by accident we started to live together. I say by accident, because he stayed much longer than initially planned and we begun to slowly plan our life together.

    On 2nd of January 2021 I moved to the Netherlands with him. Still pandemic, by the way.. Yet very fun for us and especially me, as I was in a new country.

    We live together ever since. And 5 years later, it’s quite apparent that he became the one. 

    No one feels better than the women who became aware that there is no prince to save them and they can build their dream life on their own! 

    You see at the moment I met Daan, I finally had stopped waiting for a saviour. I finally had started to realise that we all have more than 1 chance to love.

    That there are multiple options at any given time to create a compatible romantic relationship.

    In fact, I’m not afraid that we could separate one day. We might, but I know that we both have great options available even if we did.

    My past mindset was very tightly focused. It didn’t have room for reality, it only had one scenario on how this should go. The world-old stupid story of the princess and prince from fairytales.

    When I met my partner I had finally become clear on who I was! And that woman didn’t need any saving. Yet, she found even more love in being powerfully herself than ever by being a victim to save.

    I might tell you about my victim years and the one slap that change my life another time.

    For now, I’m grateful that I found someone who doesn’t have to be the one and in that is ideal for me. May you also find the love you seek, instead of the one.