Many have no idea that they are not ready to commit the attention, hours and their energy to building a new healthy relationship.
If the relationships you choose tend to be not so great that is your unconscious comfort zone. Yet to change that you would need to invest yourself in development and opening your awareness of the subconscious acts. Now that takes commitment.
Commitment to working through the uncomfortable parts of yourself both in becoming more self aware and in real life with another person.
The truth is any new relationship will bring up the uncomfortable, the question is how you deal with that on your own and together.
By becoming more aware through therapy or coaching can help you start to react differently. Notice the patterns and take a breath, before reacting in the old unconscious ways. That alone creates a new dynamic, where you can continue to develop yourself and change action patterns.
How to feel more commited?
Ask yourself how much has it cost you to no commit.. How many loving moments you haven’t been able to enjoy? How lonely have you felt? How often have you longed for someone special to just come into your life? How many times have you had to answer annoying questions about “why you don’t have anyone yet” and felt shitty afterwards?
Which relationship never flourished, because you where never ready to work on it? How many potentially good connections you surpassed, because it didn’t feel like the one?
How much love did you miss out on?
Once you know the cost of not be willing to work on it, you may realise it’s too high not to try once more. The highest cost of not working on your romantic relationships is the constant returning to the same old patterns.
By working on yourself you will learn how things can improve, by working in your relationships you’ll learn that everyone is doing it.
No relationship is perfect. All are bringing up our depths and once we are willing to accept that relationships, especially romantic ones, are a place of self-growth and a place to learn, we can have them with ease.
Whilst you think that romantic relationships are dreamily ideal, you are not open to the reality that there are two persons working on themselves and the relationship regularly, like in a life school. Relationship school.
A healthy romantic relationship is something that is built by at least 2 people, who work on themselves and the relationship. They choose each other daily and are willing to accept the not-so-comfortable.
Life brings up challenges and we are there to face them. In a healthy relationship you are aware of how it affects you personally and then communicate with your partner to understand how it impacts them. Then from there you may find ways on how to face it.
So is the cost of returning to the old patterns and unhealthy relationships enough for you to start the first step and change your life and how you relate?
If yes, then reach out to the specialist you feel connected to. I offer 30min. free intake session so that you know for sure if coaching and my communication style fits you.
